Last night, according to Reddit, the NFL and a gaggle of Facebook friends, the greatest game in NFL history was played between the Green Bay Packer and the Arizona Cardinals. The game had some controversies to it, as all barn burning events tend to. Hell, it started with one:
Would you look at that? The coin didn’t flip at all! They did reflip it, and the same team won the flip anyway. However, referring to the actual NFL rule book (Oh this is hilarious):
ARTICLE 2. TOSS OF COIN
Not more than three minutes before the kickoff of the first half, the Referee, in the presence of both team’s captains (limit of six per team, active, inactive or honorary) shall toss a coin at the center of the field. Prior to the Referee’s toss, the call of “heads” or “tails” must be made by the captain of the visiting team, or by the captain designated by the Referee if there is no home team. Unless the winner of the toss defers his choice to the second half, he must choose one of two privileges, and the loser is given the other. The two privileges are:
1. The opportunity to receive the kickoff, or to kick off
2. The choice of goal his team will defend.
Penalty: For failure to comply: Loss of coin-toss option for both halves and overtime, and loss of 15 yards from the spot of the kickoff for the first half only.
For the second half, the captain who lost the pregame toss is to have the first choice of the two privileges listed in (a) or (b), unless one of the teams lost its first and second half options, or unless the winner of the pregame toss deferred his choice to the second half, in which case he must choose (a) or (b) above. Immediately prior to the start of the second half, the captains of both teams must inform the Referee of their respective choices.
A captain’s first choice from any alternative privileges listed above is final and not subject to change.
ARTICLE 3. CHANGE OF GOALS
At the end of the first and third periods, the teams must change goals. Team possession, the number of the succeeding down, the relative position of the ball on the field of play, and the line to gain remain the same.
Guess what isn’t in there? Not a DAMN thing about that coin having to flip. For a game with so many vague rules, who would have expected that the gridiron’s ambiguous rules would haunt even the most simple of processes?
This game gets better.
When a Beautiful Play Dies
Randall Cobb makes the “greatest catch in NFL history” that had more flags on it than an Olympic’s opening ceremony. Three flags on a play that consisted of a long winded pass and an impossible catch. No yards. No Points. I don’t know what the penalties were, I just know the feeling of a wonderful play burning because of a penalty.
— NFL (@NFL) January 17, 2016
Oh yeah, and what does Cobb get in return for that blown play? Later, he manages to get a bruised lung (shit that sounds painful) and has to sit out the remainder of the game.
Why We Love Risk Taking
Apparently, Aaron Rodgers is a Battleship because he has a penchant for launching Tomahawk missiles with pinpoint accuracy. This video below is of two Hail Mary passes that netted two touchdowns. Last night’s game is on the left and you have to admire the amount of defenders that just LET IT HAPPEN. Interestingly enough, people called for the pass to be incomplete, but if you look into it, the ball never touches the ground and it is in his control. I’m not linking that, because I’m not entertaining the idea that it was not complete.
— NFL (@NFL) January 17, 2016
Rodgers landed another distance-scaling pass that netted a tremendous gain, but no score. This is still just as impressive ad the touchdown passes. So Green Bay has this quarterback who can BLOW UP the ball way down field with terrifying accuracy. This makes me want to tune into some footballing.
Here’s Your Tip
If you ever wanted to see what makes a quarterback clench his asshole so tight he’d turn poop into diamonds, you really only need to see this play failing, then succeeding all in once:
Someone needs a bonus and that someone needs to be Michael Floyd. In fact, the Cardinal’s quarterback should just give him his paycheck for this game.
RUN, RUN, RUN! (Larry Fitzgerald Pretty Much Wins the Game)
I love how I name drop like I know these players. Let me reiterate how not into watching football on TV I am. Don’t know anybody playing in this game. Not a one. I now know Aaron Rodgers. I now know Larry Fitzgerald. Will I know them…tomorrow? Maybe. Maybe not. Regardless, Fitzgerald secure the V for the Cardinals in overtime, which I guess is sudden death or something. He ran that ball like 70 yards and was taken down right at the end zone. While I love passing plays, watching a guy run up the middle of the field through EVERYONE is a bit more exciting.
Good luck stopping this deflated sniper shots that Brady will bring to the Super Bowl. I know, the Pats still have to go through the winner of the Steelers V. Broncos and the cardinals will have to go through the winner of the Seahawks V. Panthers, but if the Cardinals manage to make it to the Superbowl, they better have some defenders that can see a pass coming their way.
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